10 weeks

in trying to have a theme each day of the week Thursdays will be trauma/affair Thursday as I officially was done with my marriage on a Thursday.

Today had been 10 weeks. 10 weeks of hell and heaven, joy and disappointments, and the craziest roller coaster ride. It’s also been six months since I filed for divorce. I probably have another two months to go. When I think about the person I was just 70 days ago I’m amazed at the changes. I spent most of 2015 bawling my eyes out in my office. I drove myself to a near nervous breakdown trying to figure out what was happening and trying to fix my marriage: singlehandedly. I was a shell of a person that was dead inside.

Today I had to get new contacts. When I was waiting, an older lady came in to pick up her glasses but said she was in a rush because her husband was in hospice. It reminded me of all the pain s d worrying I did about my ex. He was in the hospital several times, had two back to back surgeries, was always sick, never took care of himself. So many memories and feelings came flooding back. I put up with so much. Had to be so strong. Ignored all the warning signs. Luckily moments like these are only moments but still painful.

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